Spotty Logic (spottylogic) wrote,
Spotty Logic
spottylogic

Shopping for Totems...

"What, exactly, are you looking for in a totem?"

"Well, I'm not sure. My wife wants me to get something dependable, sturdy, more of a family totem. Personally, I'm looking for something a little more adventurous, a little more me. Do you have anything that says, you know, 'I'm still 29'?"

"How about a Jaguar? It's a very popular totem for someone who's still 29."

"Sleek. How many miles on it?"

"Only owned once, by an Amazon warrior tribe."

"Bit scratched up, isn't it?"

"You should see the Amazon warrior tribe."

"I don't know about the warrior thing anyhow, I'm really more of a magician type. Maybe something bigger? We have a family, right?"

"Maybe you'd be interested in Bear. Good family totem, very popular. And the resurrection types come with excellent warrantees."

"Yeah, but it's a pretty poor performer in cold weather. And, I don't know, kind of blocky, like a Volvo."

"Built to last. Great traction, and there's some cold weather options."

"You couldn't really call a Bear sexy, though."

"That's a matter of opinion."

"Pardon?"

"Never mind. Sir, if you want a high-performance family totem, but want a totem that looks good in a vision, you might
be interested in Wolf. Very popular, in fact our most popular power animal. Rated number one in overall performance."

"Very nice. Good paws on that one, too. I like the gray."

"They also come in red, but the insurance tends to be higher on red models."

"Very, very nice. Good coat, too."

"Would you like to take him on a test spiritual journey?"

"Well, it's definately worth considering, but..."

"...But it's too common."

"Yes. You know, everybody and their dog."

"Maybe what you're interested in is something that doesn't actually exist?"

"Oh, like that dragon over there! The long one, one with all the legs?"

"I'd definately stay domestic, sir. You don't want any of those asian imports."
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