October 21st, 2004

[fades] browns and reds

Day 2--

JHVH-1: ...But he wouldn't eat it. He kept saying, you know, 'it is forbidden.' And after I went through the trouble of creating a Tree of Knowledge. It's disrespectful.

ARTIE: Marketing. It always comes down to marketing, doesn't it?

JHVH-1: That's not the hard sell? "Here's a garden. Eat from the garden. Here's the fruit of knowledge of good and evil. Don't eat the fruit of knowledge of good of evil." They eat the fruit of knowledge of good and evil, they get kicked out of the garden. Look how well it worked with the camels.

ARTIE: Won't work, begging your infallibility's forgiveness.

JHVH-1: Care to repeat that? Rephrasing with variation?

ARTIE: Can I avoid it?

JHVH-1: Your choice, but we can always put a few extra commandments into Phase 3. Start with forbidding coffee shops, work our way up. Clay tablets are cheap, Artie.

ARTIE: Now that's the hard sell.

JHVH-1: All things bright and beautiful, right? So, why won't it work?

ARTIE: Target demographic isn't in line with your sales strategy. You're positioning this as "the forbidden fruit," right? Like the forbidden dance, or forbidden love.

JHVH-1: Exactly. It never fails.

ARTIE: Unless your audience misses your sales message.

JHVH-1: What's to miss? "Here it is, it's good for you, don't eat it."

ARTIE: If your audience is in a state of grace, they'll need more than that.

JHVH-1: If there's no innocense, there's no fall.

ARTIE: But you can't market forbidden pleasure to a guilt-free audience.

JHVH-1: We need this to work. We've got to rent out the garden to the Mennonites.

ARTIE: It's time for a focus group.
[fades] browns and reds

Muddled intercontinental communication:

A BBC commentator, re: Prince William and his understandable reponse to papparazi:

"His father, prince charles, once through monkey nuts at the reporters."

There must be a cultural referenent or idiomatic expression I don't have at work here.