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Why do all ancient prophecies concern the falling of a mighty wizard, the destruction of an empire, the birth of a once and future king? Are there any ancient, crumbling tomes or crystal balls that fortell the birth of a pretty good tax accountant or marketing project manager?

Well, why not?

I'd like to know that somewhere there was a sybil that threw her head back in an ecstatic trance, and fortold "Lo, in the dying years of the second millenium hence, there shall be born a child who will grow into a man wise in the ways of Excel, and he shall make the occasional clever remark or cake, and donate many dinarii to an 'Adopt a hyena' fund."

Everyone should have a prophetic omen of their birth.

Comments

spottylogic
Oct. 16th, 2007 01:21 pm (UTC)
Bwahahah...round steak...heh...
athene1765
Oct. 16th, 2007 01:30 pm (UTC)
Yeah, I play a seer on a MUSH; this happens all the time. I'll get these really awesome splendid wonderful visions and they're entirely unhelpful.

Last time (and I must add at this point that she's very proper and British and repressed and kind of Mary Poppins if Mary Poppins was slightly more Cassandraic), she just finally went to the people she usually goes to to give visions.

"I realize," she said, "that you have rather little patience with cryptic visions. Regardless, it is my duty to give them unto you. Therefore, I shall give you the meat of the matter."

Then she leaned forward and waved her arms and boggled her eyes and screamed "DOOOOOOOM! DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! DOOM! DOOM! DOOOOOOOOM!"

Then she straightened, tidied her hair, straightened her dress, nodded, walked to the door. Turned around. "DOOOOOM!" Walked out.

Them: Check please.
spottylogic
Oct. 16th, 2007 01:40 pm (UTC)
"...and the third part of the corn shall eat the lean cows, while in the sky a red star shall shine forth, marking a great victory, and a crushing defeat, and possibly the birth of a two-headed oxen. The oxen shall be a SAVIOR to the lost people of East Pickwick, and they shall overthrow their masters, and a great parliementary seat shall be lost..."

"Look...I just wanted to know which way the Rio Grande campus is. Short form, please. Is it this way? I'll just go this way."
athene1765
Oct. 16th, 2007 01:45 pm (UTC)
That's it, I'm going to go write something funny.

And if I could draw I might just make it a webcomic.
spottylogic
Oct. 16th, 2007 01:47 pm (UTC)
Feh. You draw well enough for a webcomic, I've seen.
athene1765
Oct. 16th, 2007 01:50 pm (UTC)
I draw well enough for xkcd, possibly...
spottylogic
Oct. 16th, 2007 01:52 pm (UTC)
Well..."draw well enough for a web comic" isn't precisely a compliment :) But it was well-meant. The sketch-outliny stuff you draw with a little color would be quite passable.

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